39 weeks, 2 days. Emerson was born on his due date, so I have been trying to not expect this baby to be early, but when you get to the end, it’s hard not to hope!
The waiting is different than anything else you look forward to. It’s a mix of excited anticipation and anxiousness of the unknowns of labor on top of having no idea exactly when it’s going to happen. And for a planner like me, that can drive you crazy! Someone said the not knowing when prepares you for having a baby when your schedule suddenly looks very different than it did before.
Life looks different this time around than it did when we were at this place 22 months ago. Instead of going to a job 40 hours a week, I juggle a toddler, freelance assignments, and more loads of laundry than I care to count. Honestly, I don’t know which is easier/harder. Sometimes I wish I could just sit at a desk and not be on my feet picking up toys and a 25+ pound child all day, but there is the benefit of getting to rest during his afternoon nap! Every day I wake up wondering if today will be the day quickly followed asking myself if I have energy to have a baby in the next 24 hours!
I can’t decide if anticipating labor is easier or harder the second time around. We are praying for a natural delivery again. I know I can do it this time, but I also know it is hard! It’s true that you don’t really remember the pain, but I’ll be honest and say that if I think about it too long, I have brief memories of excruciating pain. That’s when I remind myself of the cuddly, squishy little baby that comes from it and I know it’s all worth it.
My labor with Emerson was long. To the tune of 20 hours. We were only in the hospital for about 6 of those hours, but I’m hoping and praying that what the midwives say is true, and that the time is cut in half! I think I can handle that…
Earlier this week I broke down and bought a few post-pregnancy tops and dresses. I hope they are nursing friendly, but I’m definitely ready to retire the elastic-waist shorts and over-size tanks!
Last weekend we had a long list of last-minute things to finish before baby. This weekend, there are still things to do, but nothing pressing. I’ve started getting daily texts from my mom asking how I’m doing. I’m so thankful my parents are ready to drive the 2 hours to Des Moines at a moment’s notice. Now we just wait. No one stays pregnant forever!