Becoming One: Gerard and Carrie

by Andrea Cooley

We’re continuing our Becoming One series today with a peek into the marriage of our friends Gerard and Carrie. I know I say this every time we post one of these, but I’m always so encouraged by hearing about other people’s marriages, I hope you are too! (And if you missed Carrie’s front door post, check it out here!)

When did you get married?
July 7, 2007. We picked the date because my sister was stationed in England (Air Force) and could have the holiday without extra vacation days off. (She was getting married a month later.)  I didn’t realize it was 07.07.07 until one of my bridesmaids told me! Then I rushed to get everything booked and settled in the first week of our engagement…phew!
How long did you date before getting married?
We knew each other 5 months before we started dating. 9 months of dating before we got engaged, and we were engaged for 5 1/2 months.
What was one of your biggest challenges the first few months of marriage?
My selfishness. Hands down! That was (and sometimes still is) pretty ugly.

What was something you wish you’d known before the wedding?
I’d heard before that marriage was hard and that you have to continually die to yourself. I am more of an experiential learner, so I didn’t learn that concept well until I was in the thick of it. There were definitely moments where, if we had been dating, I would question my decision to be with Gerard because all my past relationships had ended with the first fight. We got through the first fight (+20 ish or so more) and I am now able to relax in the midst of disagreement because I know our vows mean something and “divorce” isn’t in our vocabulary.

What have you learned since you’ve been married?
I’m incredibly selfish and lazy and need thicker skin! Rather, I am in the process of becoming more like Christ, less like the old Carrie, and I’m learning how to navigate my husband’s analytical mind without being offended by his suggestions of how to more efficiently wash the dishes or how to best fold his undershirts. 😉
What’s the best part about being married?
Going to bed with my best friend every night. At least, he’s in bed, but the past 2.5  years, Gerard would wait for me to fall asleep and then go work on his master’s homework. *drum roll please* He’s done now! So we can go to bed (& sleep) at the same time!!!! The part of dating I hated most was leaving his apartment and driving to mine at the end of the day. We get to carpool and LIVE together. *sigh* It’s bliss.
Carrie also happens to be an amazing photographer, so if you’re in the Des Moines area and looking for a photographer, check out her work!
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