Adam and I watched Hope Springs with Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones this weekend. We joked that it was almost like going to therapy! No really, it's a good movie and it made us talk about our marriage.
The movie is about a couple, Kay and Arnold who have been married 31 years. They don't have a terrible marriage, but they don't have a great marriage either. They sleep in separate rooms and barely talk to each other. Basically, they live like roommates and Kay is tired of it! She books an intensive weeklong therapy session for them in Maine and her husband is less than thrilled to join her.
I won't give away the ending, but there is a quote from the marriage counselor (played by Steve Carell) that I have to share. He says: "Even great marriages have bad years, but you look back and realize they were a prelude to something richer."
Marriage definitely isn't easy! But it's so worth it! Any healthy relationship is work, but that's what makes it rich, right? Unfortunately, I think in our culture people throw in the towel when things start to get hard, thinking it's easier to get a divorce than to work through their issues.
Watching this movie reminded Adam and I that we don't ever want our marriage to get to the point that Kay's and Arthur's was when they went to Hope Springs. That means we have to make it a priority, especially now, when we're adjusting to having a baby and how much our lives are changing.
I would argue that most marriages don't fall apart over night. It happens slowly. Life gets busy and you don't talk, you don't spend time together, you don't listen to each other. Then one day you realize that you haven't made any effort to invest in your relationship and you're left living with someone you hardly know.
Today I hope you take a minute to call your husband and leave him a sweet voicemail, or ask him how his day was when he gets home and really listen instead of unloading the dishwasher and making a mental list of what you need to do before Christmas. I promise it's worth it!
Who else has seen Hope Springs? What did you think? What are your favorite movies about marriage?